82 replies to this topic

[Saijee]

When I look at your character, I see a Ralphie.

[11clock]

If I place 'Holy Bible' somewhere in the title, most people will assume it's a religious game, when it's not.

That's because of the word "holy". Calling it the "Holy Bible" implies you're a religious Christian. But just calling it the "Bible" is neutral. You can even refer to "Biblical artifacts", and "Biblical prophesy" without sounding religious.

Just use terms that historians or archaeologists might use.

I'm all out for announcing my Christian faith and all, but I don't want people to think that the game itself is religious. I don't want people to criticize my game for stupid reasons. Good ideas, though.

@Saijee Ralphie is even worse.

Edited by 11clock, 14 February 2012 - 02:59 AM.

[chance]

...it's easier to make a character more likable if it's a girl.

You never met my first wife.


@11clock: tell us more about the main character. So far, all we know is that he's hired to find an ancient biblical artifact. But what about his personality? Knowing that will help suggest more fitting names.

[Saijee]

You never met my first wife.

Sorry chance, I didn't know you were married to a character.

[chance]

You never met my first wife.

Sorry chance, I didn't know you were married to a character.

Yeah. I met her in Toontown. She was singing at some club.

Actually, she wasn't really bad. She was just drawn that way.

[11clock]

I'm not sure how to explain the main character's personality, so here is the opening cutscene and conversation with the Save Guy.

Note that the main character's name is still Bobby right now.

Bobby: Greetings, people of Judonus. I found a new treasure to show you.
Bobby: I've been looking for this artifact for years, and it is proof that the legendary Bird of Fire exists.
*takes out red feather* Bobby: Behold, a Phoenix Feather!
Crowd: Oooh! Aaah!
Bobby: Don't get too close to it, it could burn your hands if you don't hold it properly!
Bobby: Unfortunately, that is all I have to show today. Carry on with your business.
*puts away Phoenix Feather* Crowd: Aww...

Save Guy: Hello, I'm the Save Guy!
Bobby: The what?
Save Guy: I can record all of your efforts you have done so far, so that you can continue from where you left off.
Bobby: What do you mean?
Save Guy: You see, the world is made up of trillions of molecules. I can store them all into a single save file!
Bobby: So...You're saying you can bend time and space and put it all into a file?
Save Guy: That's exactly what I mean! I can also heal you and raise you from the dead!
Bobby: How much does your service cost?
Save Guy: There's no currency in this game.
Bobby: Oh, right...

Edited by 11clock, 14 February 2012 - 09:59 PM.

[EdgeV]

I want my work to be original, thank you.

Do you want your work to be successful? Or do you want your work to be original?

That is the question.

[Saijee]

I want my work to be original, thank you.

Do you want your work to be successful? Or do you want your work to be original?

That is the question.

But will it blend?

[EdgeV]

But will it blend?

That being said, be sure to include some cool sadistic traps in your game. No ancient ruin is complete without them.

Edited by EdgeV, 14 February 2012 - 11:26 PM.

[Yal]

but Google Translator translates it as 'takes first.'

That would fit in with the theme, no? Both you and your rival tries to reach the treasure first?

Here is what the game looks like so far:

so here is the opening cutscene and conversation with the Save Guy.

Facepalm. Okay, I'm outta here.


Or, well, not without constructive criticism:

• Bland dialogue. Needs more one-liners. Especially the hero should repeatedly say stuff that makes him sound really cool. Listen to some Eddy Murphy movies and steal oneliners straight off them, copy lines from real Indy movies, Clint Eastwood movies, and so on. Just modify them to match the situation where you want them in. If possible, do NOT use show_message() for the dialogue; I think your game would be best off with minimal dialogue, having VOICE ACTED dialogue (make your dad voice the protagonist, I'm fairly sure he'll love to say cool Indy oneliners) with movie-styled subtitles in the bottom of the screen.
• Do NOT use a "Save Guy", and especially, don't let the protagonist COMMENT on the fact that it is possible to save the game. This is for multiple reasons:
  
• First of all, you're breaking the fourth wall and the Suppression Of Disbelief, making the player get less immersed in the game. The best way to avoid this issue: make the save points non-sentient objects, preferably floppy disks so that the player won't even need a tutorial to know what they are (everyone instantly knows floppy disk = save just as they know heart = hp up).
• Secondly, if you manage to get trough tons of deadly traps only because of your mega adventurer skills, how can you explain that the save guy did? The best way to avoid this issue is to have some sort of object as save points that may show up at loads of different places, and the player will assume it's different objects all the time.

So my suggestion is: do like Mother 3 and use frogs as save points. There live frogs all over the word except for the poles so you can put them anywhere; they are really colorful so they will stick out enough to be obvious while still they blend in the background because they're animals; and they're not sentient enough to talk so they can't break the fourth wall no matter how hard they try.


A typical cutscene could be like this:

Bob: "...Bellocque!"
BCQ: "Ah ha ha! Bobby, haven't you realized that there's nothing you find I cannot take from you?"
*Boss battle ensues*

[twelveways]

[*]Secondly, if you manage to get trough tons of deadly traps only because of your mega adventurer skills, how can you explain that the save guy did? The best way to avoid this issue is to have some sort of object as save points that may show up at loads of different places, and the player will assume it's different objects all the time.

Disagree with this, the vendor in Resident Evil springs to mind, it makes you think that there is more to the character because he can get to these places and seems oblivious to the problems you faced to get there.

Agree about breaking the 4th wall though, very few games pull it off well.

[Yal]

Disagree with this, the vendor in Resident Evil springs to mind

Remember that RE4 is set in the middle of a farmland? The main difference between an underground inca temple and the countryside is that there's more than one entrace.

To elaborate more precisely; RE4 has lots of different buildings you go trough, and there's many outdoor areas. The peddlar could take any way to reach the areas you find him in, and also most of these areas are "safe" (no enemies).
Also, the main danger in RE4 is zombies that attack you; everyone knows that zombies are easier to avoid than cleverly concealed arrow traps and gigant rolling boulders.

[twelveways]

True. Maybe the 'save guy' has always been in the temple, he could be an (almost) omnipotent priest who has the power to turn back time, you would have to bring him a relic (maybe a staone carving of a floppy disk) in order to save

[twelveways]

on topic:

If you are going for a humourous approach then alliteration works better than rhyme for names, Archaelogists/explorers are usually from quite posh backgrounds as well, so try to convey that in the name.

[Adequate]

comic relief: just call him dathan nrake

[twelveways]

Massachusets Smith

[chance]

Massachusets Smith

But what would his nickname be then? Massy? Or worse... Chu Chu?

[11clock]

but Google Translator translates it as 'takes first.'

That would fit in with the theme, no? Both you and your rival tries to reach the treasure first?

Here is what the game looks like so far:

so here is the opening cutscene and conversation with the Save Guy.

Facepalm. Okay, I'm outta here.


Or, well, not without constructive criticism:

• Bland dialogue. Needs more one-liners. Especially the hero should repeatedly say stuff that makes him sound really cool. Listen to some Eddy Murphy movies and steal oneliners straight off them, copy lines from real Indy movies, Clint Eastwood movies, and so on. Just modify them to match the situation where you want them in. If possible, do NOT use show_message() for the dialogue; I think your game would be best off with minimal dialogue, having VOICE ACTED dialogue (make your dad voice the protagonist, I'm fairly sure he'll love to say cool Indy oneliners) with movie-styled subtitles in the bottom of the screen.
• Do NOT use a "Save Guy", and especially, don't let the protagonist COMMENT on the fact that it is possible to save the game. This is for multiple reasons:
  
• First of all, you're breaking the fourth wall and the Suppression Of Disbelief, making the player get less immersed in the game. The best way to avoid this issue: make the save points non-sentient objects, preferably floppy disks so that the player won't even need a tutorial to know what they are (everyone instantly knows floppy disk = save just as they know heart = hp up).
• Secondly, if you manage to get trough tons of deadly traps only because of your mega adventurer skills, how can you explain that the save guy did? The best way to avoid this issue is to have some sort of object as save points that may show up at loads of different places, and the player will assume it's different objects all the time.

So my suggestion is: do like Mother 3 and use frogs as save points. There live frogs all over the word except for the poles so you can put them anywhere; they are really colorful so they will stick out enough to be obvious while still they blend in the background because they're animals; and they're not sentient enough to talk so they can't break the fourth wall no matter how hard they try.


A typical cutscene could be like this:

Bob: "...Bellocque!"
BCQ: "Ah ha ha! Bobby, haven't you realized that there's nothing you find I cannot take from you?"
*Boss battle ensues*

I've never planned to use show_message(), I have a fancy textbox engine that my friend made for me.
I will not have voice acting in my game, or any of my future games. I'm highly opposed to voice acting.
I was intending to use fourth-wall-breaking jokes throughout the game as humor, but I'll probably cut it back a bit. I already have the Save Guy programmed into the game, but it should be easy enough to modify him. I like jokes that break the fourth wall, though.
As for one-liners, there should be plenty of them throughout the game. I just couldn't find a place to fit any in the opening cutscene.

And please, do NOT judge my game or my future games by the graphics. I'm a programmer, not an artist. My art does not determine how good the game is, and my games are often much better than they look.

Edited by 11clock, 15 February 2012 - 10:28 PM.

[11clock]

So I decided to name the rival treasure hunter Eugene Clyde, or just Clyde. I think it sounds good for an antagonist. What do you think?

At the moment I'm debating "Toma Prima" and "Bible Hunt" for the title of the game.

EDIT: I have a feeling that people are thinking that I'm new to Game Maker. I'd like to state that I'm no stranger to Game Maker and I've been working with it for about four years. I'm still learning, but I know how to read code quite well, and I'm an expert at level designing.

Edited by 11clock, 16 February 2012 - 01:23 AM.

[Saijee]

I have a feeling that people are thinking that I'm new to Game Maker. I'd like to state that I'm no stranger to Game Maker and I've been working with it for about four years. I'm still learning, but I know how to read code quite well, and I'm an expert at level designing.

I base judge books by their covers, and the cover you showed us (screen shot) didn't look very impressive.